exploited

when some areas in life are slowly taking its shape, then others blow up in your face. i've been furious, i've been shaking of anger, feeling empowered and degraded. so far that i have started to doubt, maybe i am a toxic person, a narcissist, a psychopath. or maybe its just how some people develop to be, if they are actually not compatible. we started off being something else, grew to be best friends and it has reached to the point, that we cannot co-exist in same room anymore. and its sucking life out. i have gone through a spectrum of feelings, to come to a conclusion, all sorts of human relations actually do have a expiration date. as they say some are here for a reason, some for season, some for a life time. i never in my life thought this particularly is a season, but part of growing up, is admitting, that some things are meant to be let go. or perhaps it was also a reason, nothing less, nothing more.
it feels strange to break up with a friend. or someone whom you thought of as a friend, its times harder to realize that you are not working out, than ending an actual relationship. it is fairly new for me.
and yet again its part of remembering who you are and who you are becoming, where you stand. another nuance of human experience.
i sure hope this too will bring me closer to what i truly need within.