i'm friggin' circelin' around like a huge plastic ball. just bouncin' randomly, but yet i i always have a aim to go. and it doesn't affect me. once again. i spreaded my inner message of pure energy and lurwe and ...to be honest i failed. every master at least once has to know the feelin' of failing. it gives him the greatest power in the world: accepting. so here i am. in the end of my mission, havin' rather good glance at the restin' period of life. there...i have nothing to teach. there i can share my experience freely. there i can be me. maybe it's just between the downlows, maybe it's somewhat realdeal laidback. never mind. never matters. i visually ruined some lives around me, but what they don't know, is that they don't know. they are not able to learn. they are blinded. i had to take...to give. i'm not sorry, because i don't feel. i never feel the misery of others. i have numbed myself since i can remember not to be affected by other' feelings. i only read your body, your breathing, your heartbeats, your words that are sincere and in the beginning. all the other words and plugged in emotions are just fucking standards, not you. they are what they should be, not what they really are. and who am i to judge. i almost killed my delicate personality by giving it to a blind man. emotionally handicapped one. yet she said she tried. i don't believe any words she said. nothing else besides her mouth no longer talks in her. she died. she is ded. but i...i am still alive. breathing, being able to see, to hear, to touch...like i never had done it before. that's what i need to be. that's why i'm long gone even not explaining.
oh, mi schwiiit april, full of butterflies in the stomach
